There are hundreds of "guaranteed weight loss" machines out there, just waiting for the desperate people, hoping to lose some of their fluffiness with the very least amount of effort. Problem is...most of these are absolutely not possible for people with orthopaedic impairments. This constant barrage of "it's so easy!" being met with, "yeah, but I can't use it" can get old very fast, creating a huge level of frustration.
To try to alleviate some of that frustration, and help my fellow Adapters to realize that we don't have it quite as bad as we thought, I offer up the following examples of exercise equipment that we cannot use:
First up, I give you the i-rider horseback riding machine. (Just gonna take a second and let that name sink in...) You can ride your way to a stronger core, and um...well....maybe give yourself a nice ride while you're at it! With the instability in my leg, along with the lack of strength, there is no way I could handle this. And somehow, I'm glad! Want to see a video of this little beauty? Oh yeah, baby. You know you do!
*cough*
Ok, moving on. Here's another gem of a machine that has all the ladies lining up. It's called the Ab Circle. this little wonder has you on your knees, leaning over, and either swinging your bottom half back and forth like a cat in heat, or opening and closing your legs like a...well, I won't finish that one. Instead, I'll just let you see for yourself:
Don't bother with the whole thing. Just watch the snippet starting at 1:20. It'll be enough. Every man wants to buy one of these for his woman, but gentlemen, please take my advice and don't do it.
And of course, we always play fair at the Imperfectionist. Men have their "special" equipment too! From the time they are adolescents, boys need a way to strengthen their arm muscles. Poor little scrawny boys get picked on! Let's help them be the hot, buff Adonises that they want to be. Get every boy their very own Shake Weight!
So you see, you don't necessarily have to feel left out of the mainstream, simply because your body won't allow you to use popular exercise equipment. Sometimes all you need is a partner!
